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I’ve recently realized that when I’m tired, my mouth makes many words that make very little sense. Example:

The scene: We are tucked in and ready to fall asleep.

Charlie: *falling asleep*

Me: Good night, sweetie. I love you.

Charlie: Mmmmmm.

Me: Do you love me?

Charlie: Mmp.

Me: Because if you didn’t, my heart would break into a million pieces. I’d have to find a clock tower somewhere.

Charlie: Uh-oh.

Me: But I don’t like the idea of taking out innocent people, so it would have to be a clock tower in the middle of a bunch of serial killers and rapists. I’d be like the Dexter of mass murderers.

Charlie: Mmmhmmm.

Me: Better yet, I could strap a bomb to myself and lock myself in a room full of those ISIS guys. But with them, you get rid of some, and more just crop up. It would be a waste of good explosives.

Charlie: Or you could just go to sleep.

Me: But–do you love me?

Charlie: *snoring*